What Does Biblical Submission Actually Mean?

We arrive today at one of the most debated and frequently misunderstood sections in all of Paul’s letters. Mention the word submission, and modern ears often cringe. We hear terms like authority, headship, and obedience, and our cultural defenses immediately go up.

However, as we read Scripture, we must remember that Paul was writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit. His words aren't just cultural opinions up for endless debate—they carry divine intent for how we ought to live.

To understand what Paul is saying here, we have to look back at his core directive:

"Do not be drunk with wine or beer... Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another kindly, compassionately, forgiving. Sing and make melody in your hearts. And finally, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ."

Fear, Respect, and the Heart of Submission

The King James Version renders this as "submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God."

Modern culture prefers "softer" words like respect or reverence, but a healthy fear carries an emotional weight that changes our choices. Think back to your childhood: Did a healthy fear of your parents’ discipline change how you acted or where you went? That fear shaped your attitude.

Paul tells us that submitting to one another stems from this same reverence for God. Because of what God the Father has done for us through Jesus, fulfilling His will should be our baseline desire.

To make this practical, Paul outlines four real-world relationships where mutual submission is lived out.

1. Marriage: A Gospel Org-Chart

"Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church..." — Ephesians 5:22-23

This passage has often been taken out of context to justify unequal control or treating wives like servants. But Paul isn't describing an inequality of worth, talent, or skill.

Think of it like an organizational chart:

• Christ is the CEO and Founder.

• The Husband operates like a President.

• The Wife operates like a Vice President.

A VP submits to the President, and the President submits to the CEO. It is an arrangement of roles, not value.

More importantly, look at the instruction given to husbands:

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her..." — Ephesians 5:25

Husbands are called to lay down their lives, putting their wives' needs first—just as Christ fed, cared for, and gave His life for His body, the Church. When both partners operate out of self-sacrificing love and respect, the relationship reflects the Gospel to a watching world.

2. Parents and Children: Commands and Light

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 'Honor your father and mother'—which is the first commandment with a promise..." — Ephesians 6:1-2

When God gave Moses the Ten Commandments, the first four focused on our relationship with God, and the remaining six addressed our relationships with others. The very first interpersonal command is to honor your father and mother—accompanied by the promise of a long, blessed life.

Paul then turns to fathers:

"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." — Ephesians 6:4

Proverbs 6 offers a wonderful complement to this:

"My son, keep your father's commands and do not forsake your mother's teaching... For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light..." — Proverbs 6:20, 23

• Fathers supply the commands (the lamp/structure).

• Mothers supply the teaching (the light that illuminates why the structure matters).

3. Workplace Dynamics: Working Unto the Lord

In Paul’s day, he addressed bondservants and masters. Today, this applies directly to the employee-employer relationship.

Role	Paul's Directive	Modern Application
Employees	Obey with sincerity of heart, not just when being watched, but as servants of Christ.	Work with integrity and excellence, even when management isn't looking.
Employers	Treat workers with respect without threats, knowing God shows no favoritism.	Lead with fairness, integrity, and humility, remembering you have a Boss in Heaven.

Whether you sit in a cubicle, manage a team, or run a company, your real Manager is above. As Christians, we don't work primarily for a paycheck or a human boss; we work for the Lord.

The Golden Thread: Doing It "As Unto the Lord"

If we get bogged down in technical debates over every role, we risk missing the underlying theme that unites all of Paul’s instructions:

• Wives: Submit as to the Lord.

• Husbands: Love as Christ loved the Church.

• Children: Obey in the Lord.

• Servants/Employees: Serve as if you were serving the Lord, not men.

• Masters/Employers: Lead knowing that your Master is in Heaven.

The overarching point is simple: We submit in our daily relationships because doing so pleases God.

Stop Scheming, Start Acting

Philosopher Søren Kierkegaard once famously wrote:

"The Bible is very easy to understand. But we Christians are a bunch of scheming swindlers. We pretend to be unable to understand it because we know very well that the minute we understand, we are obliged to act accordingly."

The challenge before us isn't a lack of clarity—it is a willingness to follow Christ's example. Jesus submitted Himself entirely, even unto death on a cross, so that we might be forgiven, redeemed, and adopted into God’s family.

As we reflect on His sacrifice, communion reminds us of what He has already accomplished for us. We don't live submissively to earn points with God; we do it because we have already received His grace.

💬 Reflection Question for the Week

In which area of your life—your marriage, your parenting, or your workplace—is God calling you to show greater Christlike submission and heart service this week?

Originally delivered 2024.05.05